NIC HARALAMBOUS

View Original

Toilet Paper, Old Flags and Security Systems

It has been one hell of a weekend I must admit. I am still sick. That sucks but it didn't stop the weekends events from unfolding. What it did stop me doing for some reason was sleeping, again.Toilet Paper and DreamsFriday night I was at "The Hat" (Manhatten in Rivonia) with the boys (yes, I just said "the boys"). Everything was going well until we received a very serious phone call from one of our mates, let's call him Shitbreak1 (SB1). SB1 phones his brother Shitbreak2 (SB2) to ask him to leave the club and walk to an adjacent shopping centre (Mall) to get him some Toilet Paper(TP). Our man, SB1, had walked all the way to the shopping centre went in to the toilets, in to the cubicle and not noticed that there wasn't any TP. WHO DOES THAT? How is it actually possible, in a public toilet, to forget to check for TP? Well Shitbreak 2 stylishly leaves the club with none of us knowing, until his girlfriend comes in to the club... He had bumped in to her as he was sneaky out to make is own "deposit" at the shopping centre and was forced to tell her the whole story. So close to the perfect getaway, so very close!Hang-overs, Shopping, Old Flags, Hansa and RugbySaturday proved to be a long, long day. I woke up at 8:30am with my body tell me to go F*ck itself in a big way. I felt like Shitbreaks 1 & 2 the whole day. Nice start. Then went to Sandton where I had a business meeting (I sound so professional). Still hanging like the devils tail and missioning on I went to see my Mom and her boyfriend for lunch. I didn't eat. Then went shopping with my mom. Two pairs of shoes, shorts, T-shirts and a belt as well as finishings for my toilet. Awesome. Still hanging. Go To Shitbreaks 1 & 2 for a Braai (Barbecue) to watch the South African rugby team play England at Twickenham.

This started well, kicked straight in to the Brandy and coke, no Hansa. Everyone else drank Hansa till it seemed as if Hansa was sponsoring the 'event'. I stuck with Brandy. Rugby kicked off at 4:30pm, great, game going well we are winning then it's even, then we score a try. I am not sure exactly how many people noticed what happened next but I did: Some moronic amoral low-life fool started waving the OLD South African flag.

This might not seem like a big deal to most and many of the guys joked about it. But seriously, I am all for learning about our past, I agree with knowing about what the flags looked like, the people wore etc etc, but keep that shit at home in your fucked up life. Apartheid ended 12 years ago, it's time to let it go you Afrikaans White freak.We lost the rugby 21-23. Sad, sad day.Security SystemsSo the rugby ended, we lost and shit happens, cool. But why do days like this one have to go on? Why can't we just let it go when the rugby finishes and a few people leave? Why? As you can only guess by now I wasn't one of the people who left the braai. I stayed, I pushed on and we drank on (Shitbreaks 1 & 2 more so than me) till the early hours. Now the funniest thing about South Africa is that we all love the joys of Summer, we do. We love the fact that we can sit on a deck till 11pm in the evening and feel great.But don't let an alarm go off, don't let a dog bark and be sure not to walk past a house where there is a braai happening after dark. We were all sitting on the deck quietly involved in some heavy debate about life, suicide, friends, death, money, rugby, ladies (not chicks) and everything else when, all of a sudden the dog started barking and the next door neighbours alarm was activated. I have never seen for men jump up quicker in my life. Arms tensed, legs locked and eyes focused. We all quietly picked up the nearest blunt object and headed to the walls and gate to see what was going on. I find this incredible. At the drop of a hat we were sober as a nun (hate that metaphor) and ready to defend our land, or anothers' land from the enemy. I still don't know who the enemy was but I am sure glad that they didn't attack!Now it is Sunday and I have finally had my due sleep. Take it eash.